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That’s what I’ve been telling myself.. But whenever I do.. I can’t. I can’t seem to hold on to this reality, or to think straight. My mind is always somewhere I know.. it is where it desires to be… And even my heart wants to follow it. If it isn’t right.. Then what am I supposed to do? I am not so sure anymore if there is anything left of me.. If there is any happiness left from me. My heart tells me that I need someone to heal me… But my mind knows what is right and what I believe is right. My heart tells me to rush but my mind tells me to wait still and be patient.. Then which I guess proved all odds wrong. That the heart isn’t always right… Or I guess. It’s my desire, not my heart. Then how would I know what my heart does want right now? Or why am I feeling this anxiety, pain and sorrow right now? Why do I always ask? Why do I always need answers? I frustrate myself with finding out solutions, when in the first place, I know I just should enjoy everything and BREATHE. I guess, that’s all I need… To pause and breathe. Fill my lungs with air. with this air of reality… And there’s my problem.. I tend to seek for answers when I already know it even before hand. Then what is this? I’m confused. I am so confused… Then, suddenly I would think of someone to mend me right away.. I’m always thinking of this way. Whenever I don’t know what to do… I’ll think of you as my solution.. Yes, you.. But who are you? I don’t know you just yet. Whoever you are, SAVE ME. Save me from this pain and wishful thinking. Save me from this misery I’m making myself. I just desperately need you now. I want you to hold me tight, so that all these confusions may be gone. I need you right now… Please do find a way that we may meet our ways right now. I need to know you right now.
Please…
Please…
(Source: wakesandsails.tumbler.com)
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Submitted by itsyourboylinxxtran
Here is a blog that will change your LIFE - it’s a must follow
Don’t ever let go just because the rain got you saoking wet and cold. Just hold still and always say to yourself that there will come the sun…
Why do you like a person? In a deeper sense… how do you love a person?
Right there in the photo is Giovanni Santos or Jio as his friends call him. He’s a dancer at UP Manila Indayog Dance Varsity Team. He’s currently taking up Medicine at the University of the Philippines Manila. He was his batch Salutatorian in High School at Philippine Science High School… ….And his in a relationship with who they call “Des”.
“Pano kaya nagustuhan ni Jio si Des?”, ”Di ko talaga maintindihan kung pano nya nagustuhan si Des? Ang swerte tuloy ng babaeng ‘yun!” My cousin would always rant whenever we speak about Jio. Who would not like him. He’s so smart and talented plus, his charm extends to its extremes when he dances. Anyone who would see him dance would be so pleased. Like, half of all the people I know who also knows him likes him. And I won’t put on an argument with them for that. But it would always break their hearts to remember that he’s already in a relationship. But I would just listen to their rants.. and then it made me think deeper… When you like a person… why do you like her/him? How do you know that you like him/her? And when you do, how can you say that you already love him/her? Is it her/his looks? Her/his personality? Her/his family background? Level of intellect? Number of achievements? Talent, skill and ability? Until it all made sense to me. All of my cousin’s questions are slowly being answered inside my head.
When you fall in love, there is no measurement of her/his physical aspects, intelligence, capabilities, disabilities or personality. You become blind from all of these. When you’re in love, all her/his perfectness from your own perspective in your own fancy thoughts are all that you can consume. Others may see them ordinary or mediocre, but as for the person in love, it must have been how her/his eyes twinkle, how she/he would smile or laugh that would make his/her heart skip a beat. Or maybe how her/his hair just falls or how she/he would speak and say his/her name. Through this magic that we call love, all of her/his imperfections fade in the background… and it’ll all become our own brand of perfection. The kind that we will always long for, no matter how ugly or imperfect others may see and judge them.
I guess, that’s how it works. And their questions are all answered in my head.
Para sa mahal kong nanay… SANA HINDI PA HULI ANG LAHAT.
Una, gusto kong sabihin sa’yo na mahal kita :) Alam kong alam mo yun at minsan, medjo overrated na dahil paulit-ulit ko nalang tong sinasabi sa’yo.. Pero, totoo lahat yun. At totoong nararamdaman ko talaga yun. Sa totoo lang, nagulat din ako kung pano tayo naging ganito kaclose. Fan mo lang naman ako dati :) Isa ka sa mga taong hinahangaan ko ng sobra bukod sa mga artista. [Haha! Pero, totoo. Walang halong bola :P] At dahil dyan, SALAMAT :) Isa pa’tong salitang ‘to. Siguro minsan wala nalang tong salitang to sayo kasi paulit ulit din ako dyan. Hehe. Pero, sobrang umaapaw kasi, e :’) Sobrang hindi ko lang din alam yung pakiramdam. Na, sobrang overwhelmed ako kasi binigay kayo ni Lord sakin :) Binigay ka nya sakin para maging “nanay” ko… Kahit na di naman talaga tayo related by blood o kahit ano. Kahit na ganito ako.. Mahal mo ko :) kahit palagi akong walang pera, ikaw talaga ang gumaganap na nanay ko. Haha. Pagpalagi akong nagdadahilan, napipilitan ako dahil sayo [Haha! Sobrang joke lang :)) :P] Pero, hindi. Agad sabihin lang nun, ganun ka kalakas at kaimportante sakin. Hindi ko nga alam kung pano ko ibabalik sayo lahat ng ginagawa mo sakin, e.. Pero, alam mo namang mahal kita.. At kapag sikat nako, hihingi nako ng video greeting kay Yeng ‘twing birthday mo. Hehe ♥ Basta Nay… Mahal na mahal talaga kita.. [naiiyak-iyak pako, pero.. Haha!] Mahal talaga kita!! At proud na proud ako dun. Proud na proud ako sayo. Hindi mo’ko pinapabayaan.. Nandyan ka lang palagi pag nangungulit lang ako minsan. At nandyan ka padin kahit busy-busihan lang ako palagi. Alam ko namang di ka na magbabago sa pagiging nanay sakin, e. Kaya wala nakong mahihiling pa. Kung meron man, sana matupad din yung mga gusto mo mangyari sa buhay… In God’s perfect timing ;) At sana din… Magkaboyfriend ka na para pwede nadin ako. CHOS!! Syempre joke lang yun :))) Pero alam naman natin na… Ibibigay din ni Lord yung TAMANG prinsipe mo kasi ganun ka ka-precious na prinsesa :)
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH, NANAY PRYZ! SALAMAT SA LAHAT!! Hayaan mo, mag aaral akong mabuti at sabay tayong magpapayaman. Alam ko namang masaya ka na na naaachieve naming mga anak mo ang gusto namin, e :) Kain tayo sa labas, libre ko. Pag nairaos ko tong 1st yr ko. Labas tayo bago magbakasyon :) Hehe.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!! Gusto ko lang din sabihin na… Hindi ako nakakalimot :)
I LOVE YOU!!! >:D< ♥
So go and take a step forward… :)
(Source: iiiisabelle, via smith071cr)
“Shared joy is half the sorrow”
Today, I was feeling restless… Maybe because I’m feeling kinda homesick.. and also.. there’s also this feeling of need of someone.. This feeling of loneliness isn’t only because I miss my family or I’ve no time to talk to anyone and am not comfortable having a fun chat with the people here. This feeling of loneliness, is what’s consuming the rest of me deep inside. I’ll admit that I do miss to be in a relationship… I miss to held hands with the person I want. I miss enfolding myself to the rest of him. I miss how someone could make me feel so happy, yet so sad…
I began to be anxious as I think of those things.. Until I realized I’m already singing a song from my head:
“I’m so sick and fed up of being alone,
So come here and hold me close”
Unconciously, I was singing that line to a melody for some time. My thoughts sunk deeper to my emotions.. ‘Till it began to hurt a bit. I was asking God to give me a clue of His plans.. Until before I sleep, I opened my favorite application, the ‘God wants you to know’ app. I’m always referring there whenever I ask for some answers. And for tonight, I know it won’t fail to answer my bothered thoughts. The app said:
“On this day of your life, Nixx… God wants you to know that shared joy is a double joy; shared sorrow is half a sorrow. There is no need for you to go it alone. There are people who love you, and who are ready to give you much you needed support. There are even more, — way more than you can possibly imagine people who CAN love you if you give them a chance. Make ‘share joy, half the sorrow’ your motto for today.”
Sometimes, in the silence of the moment, we come to feel that we’re alone and in need of someone to be there for us. When all of a sudden, we have our friends and family to always support us and who loves us dearly. We become impatient that we end up with our wrong decisions.. We become blind of what we have in the present. We dwell to much in our emotions that we unconciously restrain ourselves and take the chance away from others to make us happy. And in the end, it is only the time when we come to realize that God has His own plans and that plan is not for now. Everything is in His perfect timing. Never failing. And all we have to do is to wait for that perfect moment. And while we wait, the waiting process is the time for us to cherish, nourish and love the people around us. The time for us to grow and be mature enough when His ‘perfect time’ comes.
I know that up until now, God is preparing him for me. And that my heart is still in the process of healing from its brokeness. I know that someday, God will only give him to me when I am ready. When my heart is ready, and when he’s ready enough also to take my hand from my Father, God. My heart may be in pain right now, but I know that in God’s plan I am not waiting in vain.
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You say:
It’s impossible.
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God says:
All things are possible. (Luke 18:27)
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You say:
I’m too tired.
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God says:
I will give you rest. (Matthew 11:28-30)
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You say:
Nobody really loves me.
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God says:
I love you. (John 3:16 & John 13:34)
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You say:
I can’t go on.
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God says:
My grace is sufficient. (II Corinthians 12:9 & Psalms 91:15)
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You say:
I can’t figure things out.
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God says:
I will direct your steps. (Proverbs 3:5-6)
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You say:
I can’t do it.
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God says:
You can do all things. (Philippians 4:13)
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You say:
I’m not able.
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God says:
I am able. (II Corinthians 9:8)
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You say:
It’s not worth it.
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God says:
It will be worth it. (Romans 8:28)
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You say:
I can’t forgive myself.
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God says:
I FORGIVE YOU. (I John 1:9 & Romans 8:1)
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You say:
I can’t manage.
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God says:
I will supply all your needs. (Philippians 4:19)
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You say:
I’m afraid.
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God says:
I have not given you a spirit of fear. (II Timothy 1:7)
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You say:
I’m always worried and frustrated.
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God says:
Cast all your cares on ME. (I Peter 5:7)
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You say:
I don’t have enough faith.
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God says:
I’ve given everyone a measure of faith. (Romans 12:3)
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You say:
I’m not smart enough.
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God says:
I give you wisdom. (I Corinthians 1:30)
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You say:
I feel all alone.
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God says:
I will never leave you or forsake you. (Hebrews 13:5)
(via parayeah)
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Submitted by thekaycho
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(Source: maddiemarielovesyou)
2011 has been a really bitter-sweet year. But it’s also the year when I learned to take chances, have faith in them, and never let go. It taught me how to be faithful in what God has destined for me…
It has given me extraordinary experiences which I will never forget, lots of blessings I never thought I would have and people that has brought me to the extremes of my own happiness… Some things may have changed. I may have regret some decisions I made. A love one may have left. My heart may have been broken. But the persons left, memories kept and the love that still remains, has equalled it all out. It gave me more than what I deserve to have. And I’ll be eternally grateful for that. Words are not enough to contain what I trully feel. I want to thank my Father for his gifts. He trully is the one who knows what I need and what I want. Only Father knows what are the desires of my heart… and He grants it in His own precious time. May I be just His little girl waiting patiently on His will. May He continuously keep this smile of mine… My wishes for 2012 will not end right here. For it’ll only start with my wishes for the rest of you… I wish for your happiness.. and that yours will be my happiness, too. I wish that your wish may come true…
I had a wonderful year bacause of you all… I’ll miss the times we had together, but I’m much more looking forward to have a better one with you. May our hearts keep us in loving each other.
And for 2011, thank you for the joys and the pains you brought.. We’ve learned a lot from you. May the journey you have sailed in the depths of our oceans be not just a wonderful memory… may we never forget what you taught us. Thank you for giving us your time. May your journey as our past continue… Goodbye